


the choices we make

by Chiaroscuro555



Category: Actor RPF, Bjyx, Chinese Actor RPF, 陈情令 | The Untamed (TV) RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst, BJYX | Wang Yi Bo/Xiao Zhan | Sean is Real, BoXiao freeform, Childhood Sweethearts, M/M, Porn With Plot, Porn with Feelings, Separations, Slice of Life, Smut, YiZhan World Domination
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-01
Updated: 2020-10-01
Packaged: 2021-03-08 02:47:51
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,015
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26748301
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Chiaroscuro555/pseuds/Chiaroscuro555
Summary: Xiao Zhan is a famous singer who just got back from overseas to have his solo concert, when someone from his past unexpectedly came and threw him off balance.
Relationships: Wang Yi Bo & Xiao Zhan | Sean, Wang Yi Bo/Xiao Zhan | Sean
Comments: 5
Kudos: 106





	the choices we make

The loud screams and applause reverberated in the huge dome, ending the night on the high note for Xiao Zhan. He bowed deeply, feeling very touched. This was his first solo concert in China after he's back from Europe, and judging by the full seats, he had nothing to worry about.

He walked back to his changing room, getting congratulated every few steps, until his manager approached him with stars in her eyes and an unmistakable glee in her steps.

"Zhanzhan, you have a special guest waiting at your changing room." She was almost out of her skin from the giddiness. She couldn't help but jumped up and down and squealed. 

"What special guest?" He furrowed his brow, thinking if he invited any special person to his concert, but it came out blank.

"Just… go!" She pushed him to move faster and into his changing room. 

"What… " his voice faltered seeing the person who sat leisurely at the couch, feet miles apart. The familiar alpha pose.

"Hi, there, thank you so much for waiting, ah… but is it possible to ask for your signature?" 

_His manager acted like a star struck teenager, but who doesn't? He was the embodiment of a walking Adonis, the geges and jiejies dropped in front of his feet like flies._

He sighed.

"Sure." 

That deep baritone voice still had the same effect on him. _On his nether region._ It's like he's been Pavloved to feel aroused every time he heard _that_ voice.

"Thank you! I-I will treasure this until my last breath!"

Xiao Zhan groaned.

"I will leave you two alone now, Zhanzhan, you had press con in an hour, I will be back before then." She winked at him then closed the door on her way out.

"Zhan-Ge."

He froze.

"Lock the door."

He automatically walked to the door and locked it. 

"Good. Now come here."

It's been years… _years_ , since he last saw him. But that voice, those commands, were still ingrained in his brain. It was like a baser instinct for him to do whatever the owner of the voice asked… _told_ him to do.

"Yibo… " he hated how whiny he sounded.

"Did I tell you to speak?"

He shut his mouth right away.

"Have you learned to disobey me, Zhanzhan? After all this time? After all the effort I put into molding you into the man you are right now?"

He whimpered in ecstasy, his cock had already leaked and he needed to be fucked. Like right now.

"Come here, baobei." Yibo patted his own thigh, signaling Xiao Zhan to sit on his lap.

Xiao Zhan eagerly crawled into his lap, already panting like a dog in heat.

"Now, show me what you have learned since you've been gone."

Xiao Zhan swore he saw a flash of hurt in the younger man's eyes, but it's gone in a second.

"Yibo… I-I… " but he couldn't continue because the younger man had claimed his mouth, quite aggressively. 

He pushed his tongue inside, and licked it, bit it, all in familiar rhythm. 

_He tasted the same._

Then the younger man bit too hard until it drew blood. But he only sucked the blood and nipped the lips again, while his hands roamed the side of his body, tugging his shirt off.

"Do you know how long I've been looking for you? Do you know how hard it was for me?" He unbuckled his pants quickly, hand slipped inside the silk underwear, palming the leaking erection in a familiar gesture.

"Yibo… I'm so sorry… I didn't mean to… " Xiao Zhan moaned while he drove his hands into Yibo's thick, soft hair.

"Then why did you?" Yibo paused his movement, and looked straight into his eyes.

"Are we really going to talk about this right now?" He panted harshly, his mind's clouded with the overwhelming feeling of familiarity, yet it felt different.

"Yes." He moved his hands out from inside the pants, leaving Xiao Zhan feeling empty.

"Yibooo… " he whined unabashedly while moving his hips lewdly against the thick jeans that didn't hide the other's huge erection.

"Zhan-Ge…" Yibo kissed him, chastely this time. "Tell me, where were you all this time. Tell me, why did you leave me… again. Tell me everything… please." Yibo caressed Xiao Zhan's face softly, making him almost cry by the tenderness of his touch.

  
  
  
  


\-----

  
  
  
  


Xiao Zhan remembered the first time they saw each other. They were only 10 and 15 at that time. They became attached at the hip as soon as they met… just before Xiao Zhan's mother was marrying Yibo's father.

He still remembered a small face that's full of tears, belongs to a rather small child that attached himself to his father's side. Strangely, that little boy formed an immediate attachment to him, following him everywhere with his bright eyes and even brighter smile. 

Xiao Zhan never noticed when his feelings changed.

Actually that was a lie.

He _knew exactly_ the second that he knew he had feelings for Yibo.

  
  
  
  
  


It was one afternoon when he was 22 and Yibo was 17 and he was just back home from college to spend holiday at home. Bringing his then-girlfriend.

Yibo wasn't home when he arrived at the house, so he proceeded to show his girlfriend - who he didn't even remember her name - around the house. An excuse to make out, really.

He brought the girl to his room, and started to kiss her passionately. They were in the early stage of a relationship, so it made sense if they wanted to _do_ it, every time, everywhere. Xiao Zhan was in the middle of unbuttoning her top, when the door to his room was opened with a bang.

"Zhan-Ge!!! You're home… " he stopped abruptly when he saw them in the compromising position. "Ah.. uhm.. I'm sorry… " he slammed the door on his way out, as sudden as his arrival.

"Oh god, is that your little brother? He's as handsome as you…I hope we didn't corrupt him." the girl giggled and pulled Xiao Zhan to continue whatever he was doing. 

But Xiao Zhan's mood was gone. He saw the hurt in Yibo's eyes as clear as day, and it's clouding his mind.

"Sorry, but I think we should stop. My parents will be back soon, we might as well be prepared for dinner." He stood up and pulled her with him. "I will take you to your room." 

She was confused by the sudden change in her boyfriend's mood, but she didn't say anything, just fixed her top and moved her stuff to the guest room.

Dinner came and Yibo was nowhere to be seen. He asked his father, but he just shrugged and mumbled "Kids these days…" 

Then he turned to his mother.

"I think he's at the park. He used to hang out there with his friends, playing skateboards."

"Bah! Skateboards! More like drinking and smoking!" His father slammed the table, making Xiao Zhan jump. "He was getting out of control ever since you left, Zhanzhan. I don't know what to do about him anymore."

Xiao Zhan was stunned. 

The Yibo that he knew used to be the sweetest, most adorable kid. 

But that was almost 3 years ago, before he went to Korea to study and didn't want to go back home before he could at least catch up with the very intense art program. Now he felt like he somehow failed the younger boy.

"I'll try to talk to him, dad, mom, don't worry too much, he was just a kid."

But talking wasn't as easy as the reality hit. 

Yibo was _never_ home. 

He left very early and sometimes went back home at the ungodly hour, where everyone was already asleep. He didn't even think about his girlfriend, who whined every chance she got, because she's horny and wants to go out. Xiao Zhan finally relented and took her to a tourist sightseeing at the end of their 5 days holiday.

Xiao Zhan got back late at night and left his girlfriend alone to smoke on the rooftop. He's getting tired with her incessant pestering and demand, and he needs some down time of _not_ talking. He quitted smoking some time ago but now he needs it _badly._

He climbed to the rooftop from his window, there's a fire escape stairs that lead straight to the top. He sat down on the asphalt, flicked his lighter, and dragged that first smoke inside his lung deeply.

He realized the other's presence only after a few drags. 

"Yibo. There you are. I've been looking for you."

"Yeah? You're not looking very hard then." He sat beside him, and took the cigarette from his fingers before he inhaled. "I've been here all the time. Waiting for you to come." Xiao Zhan could smell the alcohol in his breath.

"Is it true, gou zai zai? Father said that you've been drinking and smoking after… after I left?"

The younger boy did not answer. Only inhale the cigarette and make rings from the smoke.

"What if it's so? Are you gonna scold me? Punish me? Leave me _again?_ "

The last word was being said with so much hurt and betrayal, Xiao Zhan's heart constricted.

"Doesn't matter, Yibo, you know I'm just one phone call away, right? You can call me anytime, tell me about your day, your girlfriend…"

"Right. Girlfriend." He scoffed as if it's the most disgusting word he ever said. "Just like you and _your_ girlfriend." He flicked the ash away.

"Yibo…" Xiao Zhan turned to face him. "Please tell me what's wrong? Why are you like this? You used to be the sweetest boy and the brightest one. What happened?" He tried to hold Yibo's hand, but the younger pushed him away and put the cigarette away.

"You want to know what happened?" He looked at Xiao Zhan intensely, making Xiao Zhan feel something tingled under his skin and he felt nervous. "You." Yibo moved closer swiftly and cupped Xiao Zhan's neck and pulled him closed until they were nose to nose. 

"You happened. You left me alone, to deal with my own damn feelings, and now you're back bringing a _fucking_ girlfriend. So tell me, how am I supposed to feel about that, when you know exactly how I feel about you." 

Xiao Zhan could feel the hot breath tickling his face, and he suddenly felt that he was exposed _._

"What? What feeling, Yibo?" He knew. Oh, he knew exactly how the younger one felt about him. _That's exactly why he left._

"Still pretending, I see. Fine." Yibo moved lightning fast, and kissed Xiao Zhan fully in the mouth, making him gasp and in turn, open his mouth to the assault of the younger's tongue inside. Yibo expertly moved his tongue around Xiao Zhan's mouth, making him moan lewdly and chase that tongue around with his own.

"Yibo…" he pulled himself off to take a breath from that intense kissing. "Where did you learn to do that?" He touched his forehead to the other, while clinging to him as if his life depended on the kiss alone.

"Would you like to know what else I've learnt?" 

Without waiting for the other to answer, he moved his hands downward, cupped the erection that Xiao Zhan didn't even realize he had and kissed him again.

"Ah, Yibo, what are you doing?" Xiao Zhan moaned into the kiss, feeling overwhelmed by the touch of Yibo's big hands.

"You. I'm doing you." He moved his mouth down to the older's neck, nipped and sucked it until it left a mark.

"W-what? Yibo, what are you talking about...ahh.." his body betrayed whatever his brain was warning him about, when the younger unzipped his pants and freed his leaking erection. 

"Yibo! Stop it! You're still a minor!" He hissed when he felt the cold air hit his now freed cock.

"I'll be 18 in a few weeks, and shut up." He licked the slit of the older's erection, making him shiver lightly and curved his body closer to him.

Xiao Zhan finally relented and drove his hands into Yibo's hair, and pushed him deeper to his cock, fucking his mouth.

Yibo's mouth sheathing his cock perfectly, and the way his tongue moved… _gosh_ , he could die now and wouldn't regret it. His other hand massaged the underside of his balls lightly, and it moved to the perineum, until it found its target. 

Xiao Zhan gasped when the finger touched his rim. He had never been touched there before, and it's a strange but not unpleasant feeling altogether.

"Yibo… ah… I'm cumming…" he felt the pressure building fast, making him tense and finally with the last suction, he shot ribbons of white straight to the younger's mouth. Yibo lapped every drop of his cum greedily, and sucked the leftover. He was feeling very light headed by that erotic view, but when he saw that Yibo's touching himself, it drove him crazy.

"Let me." He removed Yibo's hands from his _huge_ erection, and started to unzip his jeans, freeing the cock.

_Damn._

He saw this kid grow up. They were taking _baths_ together. But _hot damn…_

He gawked at the sheer size of Yibo's erection.

"Like what you see?"

He could hear the smirk in the gremlin's teasing voice. Then he came closer and whispered in his ear, seductively.

"I want to bury this inside of you, Ge. I want to see you writhe in ecstasy, and crying, shouting my name when you cum, many, many times, from my cock alone." He licked his ear. "Will you let me? Give me the honor to fuck you?"

_Jesus, this kid! His filthy words alone could make him cum!_

He shuddered at the thought of another man's cock breaching him, stretched him and made him cum. _This boy's cock._ The one he's been in love with since he was 18.

"Yes." He growled. "Yes, Yibo, fuck me please."

Yibo didn't wait for another word, as he flipped Xiao Zhan so he was on top of him.

"Ge…" he kissed him, and half tore open his shirt. "Do you know how long I have loved you?" He sucked the older's neck, leaving marks everywhere in his unblemished skin. "Ever since I saw you." He chuckled. "Can you believe that?"

"I do, Yibo. Because I fell in love with you too."

Yibo stopped his track. Then he kissed Xiao Zhan's forehead.

"We've wasted so much time…" he pulled Xiao Zhan up to their feet. "Let's go back to your room."

They walked back down the stairs quickly, with clothes still half open, and when they entered Xiao Zhan's room, Yibo pushed him down the bed, then locked the door.

Then he delved to Xiao Zhan's chest, sucking one of his nipples while flicking the other with his fingers.

Xiao Zhan buckled under the sudden assault of the most sensitive part of his body.

"Yibo… Yibo… ahhh… don't… aaahh… " he moaned, and held Yibo's hair tight, trying to pull him away.

"Zhan-Ge, will you relax? We haven't even started yet…" his eyes shone with so much love for the older man, making him shivered in delight and anticipation.

"Yibo, I-I've never done anything like this before…" he panted heavily, his mind already hazy from all the pleasure.

"Mm… just relax, Ge, I'll teach you." He took off the rest of their clothes together and pulled out a bottle of lube from his bedside table. He poured it generously to his hand and warmed it before he touched the older's rim.

Xiao Zhan jumped from the alien sensation touching his never-been-touched-before place, but Yibo murmured encouragement, and love words to his ears making him relaxed enough to finally let him put his finger in.

"Ah!" He almost screamed, but Yibo closed his mouth by putting two of his fingers inside it. "Hmmpf…!"

"Do you want to wake up our parents, Ge? Or better, your _girlfriend?_ Do you want her to join us?" Yibo moved his finger in and out of the hole slowly, "Relax, Ge, this is only the first one, you need 2 more at least to better accommodate me." He then inserted the second finger inside, making Xiao Zhan mewled and thrashing wildly, trying to find purchase in the bedsheet.

"Yibo, I'm gonna cum… oh _god…_!" He never felt pleasure like this before, not even when he fucked his girlfriend. This was an entirely new experience for him, to almost cum untouched but feeling very overwhelmed by all the new and alien sensation.

Then Yibo halted all movement.

"What… Yibo…!" He whined so desperately.

"Beg me."

"... What?" He thought he heard wrong from all the lust, but Yibo repeated the command.

"Beg me to fuck you, Ge, or I won't do it." He teased the edge of his abused rim with light pressures, as if reminding him of the overwhelming feeling he was just experiencing.

"Please… please, Yibo, I beg you…" he mewled so desperately for the younger to fill him.

"Please what, Ge?" 

"Please...Yibo, I beg you to fuck me… " he was so ashamed, but it all went away when he felt his hole was breached by 3 fingers at once.

"Is this what you want, Ge? My fingers?" He moved it in and out, slowly dragged it inside his silky wall, scissoring it open.

"Yes… no, I want your cock Yibo... please... ngghhaahhh!"

Yibo twisted his finger and touched his prostate, making him see stars and finally cum, untouched.

"Fuck, Yibo, you make me feel like a virgin again…" he felt like he just did a 10k marathon, and almost lose his breath, whimpering like a mess on his crumpled bed.

Yibo was lying down with his back leaning to the headboard, starting to massage his own cock, which was now swollen and red, and leaking. Xiao Zhan looked at the monstrosity in front of him, and suddenly felt a _hunger_ inside him. He swiftly climbed into Yibo's lap, and circled his arms around his neck.

"I've begged you to put your cock inside me, and what did you do? You play with yourself… how unfair… " he nuzzled the younger's neck, while moving his hips seductively, nestling the big cock between his butt.

"You really are a tease, you know that, Ge? You tease me with your seductive walk..." he squeezed his butt hard, separating them further. "You tease me with your sexy mole under your lips…" he bit his lips hard. "And you tease me with your girlfriend…" he slipped his three fingers inside the already loose hole. "Almost fucking her when you knew I would come inside your room…" he bend his fingers, grazing his prostrate with his nails. "Making me go crazy with lust…" 

Xiao Zhan was overstimulated with desire, he saw black.

"Yes… yes! I did it all on purpose, just… fuck me, Yibo, please!!"

He hadn't finished his sentence when he felt the bulbous head breached his rim, entering his hole.

"You want this? I'll give you this, Ge, this is yours, for as long as you want it…" he pushed further inside,making it remembering his shape and his girth slowly, torturously.

Xiao Zhan became a blubbering mess, he's making incoherent noises that he himself didn't even recognize.

When finally Yibo sheathed his girth fully inside,he felt so… full, so satisfied.

"Yibo… I love you." He needed to say the words, before he went completely over the edge with lust.

Yibo went still for a second, but then he moved, slowly, languidly, as if he had all the time in the world.

"I love you too, Zhan-Ge, ever since the day I met you. And I don't know if I can stop." He brushed a tear that suddenly ran from his eyes.

"Then don't. Don't ever stop loving me,as I won't stop loving you, baobei…" Xiao Zhan kissed the tears, and moved his hips faster. "But now I want you to properly _fuck_ me,I _beg_ you,Yibo…" he heard desperation in his voice, but he didn't give a fuck anymore. _Yibo loved him._ And he loved him too. So much it hurts to finally admit it out loud, since he always kept it in the deepest part of his heart and threw the lock and key away, in hope that no one ever found out.

But the sincerity of this boy… man, really, he was more of a man inside - a boy with a 55 years old man's mind - he changed his perspective. He's willing to take the step, if it means that he's going to be with the one he loves.

His mind went back to the present, where his body was overstimulated by his approaching third orgasm.

"Yibo… ahh, I don't think I can last long...nghhh" he held onto the younger's neck tightly, and finally spurted out dry cum, and when his inner wall squeezed Yibo's cock tight, he came too, filling him full with his hot seed.

  
  
  
  
  


"Yibo… " Xiao Zhan nuzzled the younger's neck. "You know we have to keep this a secret from our parents, right?" He made circles with his fingers on his chest.

"Why?" 

He could feel Yibo's frowning.

"Because, we're practically brothers, and you need to focus on your study. Dad told me that you're out and smoking and drinking alcohol all the time."

"We're not even related aside from your mom married my dad. And yeah, because I still couldn't wrap my head around why you left me so sudden, without explanation." His voice sounded hurt, it clenched Xiao Zhan's heart.

"That's because I was so stupid, I'd rather ran away and deny my growing feelings for you, rather than be a man and admit it. I have my reasons, and most of them were to protect you, baobei."

"I don't need your protection, Ge."

"Yeah, I knew that now." He kissed his broad shoulder. "But for now, let's keep it to ourselves. Yeah?"

"One condition." Yibo turned around to look at him, intensely.

"Oh?"

"I want to go to Korea with you."

  
  
  
  
  


At first, their father did not agree. 

Not until Yibo proved that he'd graduate within the top 3 of his class.

Yibo being Yibo of course agreed to the challenge and graduated 6 months later as number 2 in his class. And he never drank alcohol and smoked again.

A week after graduation, Yibo entered Xiao Zhan's two bedrooms apartment in Korea, kissing him, and fucking him in every corner of the apartment.

"I can't believe I'm finally here with you." Yibo nipped Xiao Zhan's earlobe from behind, thrusting into him slowly, while bending him over the table.

"I can… ahh… well, my hole can… ngghh…"

Yibo just chuckled and ram into the older again, while kneading his perky butt.

"Do you miss me? This whole 6 months apart? Or you just going around fucking girls?" He whispered into Xiao Zhan's ear, and dragged his girth in and out super slowly, torturing the answer out.

"You seem to be getting off of talking like shit, Yibo, ahh… and you know damn well… aaahh yes that's it," he moaned when Yibo grazed his prostate. "You know damn well, you've ruined me for everyone else… nghhaahh…" Yibo moved his hip faster and faster until they're both climaxing at the same time. 

"I love you, baobei." He kissed the older's shoulder and hugged him close.

"I love you too, gou zai zai… " Xiao Zhan drifted off in sleep, feeling sated and happy. For the first time in his life, they finally found their home in each other.

  
  
  


\-----

  
  
  


Two years had passed, and Xiao Zhan was in his last term. He already secured a job as a part time graphic designer, while he worked on his art at home. 

_Home._

Where he lived with Yibo for the last two blissful years.

Oh, they argued, they fight, but they also work it out, and they've never been this happy.

That night, when they ate dinner, Xiao Zhan told the younger, that someone from a big talent agency approached him to join their agency, because he heard him sing at karaoke night a few days ago.

"And…?" Yibo asked him, eyes questioning. "Are you interested?"

"Maybe, but not that interested to leave my study behind. I only have 1 year left, then I'm off to the adult's world." He pinched Yibo's cheek.

"Ge!" He swatted the hand. "I'm not a child anymore!" He pouted.

"Yes you are… see those yeekies? I love those yeekies, so yum yum…" he bit Yibo's cheek playfully.

"I'll get back to you for that… " Yibo growled and kissed Xiao Zhan hard, nipping his lips until it's swollen, then he moved to his neck, leaving bite marks everywhere. The new ones covering the old purplish faded ones.

"Yibo, you're so insatiable… " Xiao Zhan moaned lewdly, and squeezed Yibo's butt, he's already hard and his hands fumbled with his zipper. He was so well trained by now that he could accommodate Yibo's cock easily. 

Yibo pulled him into his lap, his cock inside the older. He moved his hips against the cock, and Yibo sucked and bit his nipples until it's swollen and red. He flushed hard from the approaching climax.

"Yes, harder baobei… harder… ahhh" he screamed out loud when Yibo aimed for his prostate repeatedly, and cum between their bodies, when the doorbell rang.

He felt like liquid, when he looked at the clock.

"10 p.m? Did you expect someone, Yibo?" He stood up from Yibo's lap, feeling the cum slide down his thigh. Yibo took off his shirt and cleaned him. 

"Better use your pants before opening the door, Ge, I don't want anyone seeing you in your most beautiful look." He gave a once over at Xiao Zhan. "But then again it won't matter, you have my marks all over your body." He kissed him softly, before standing up. "Go, see who it is, I'm gonna clean up." He wiped a little bit of cum on the floor. Xiao Zhan nodded and wore his shorts before opening the door, not bothering with his top.

He looked out at the peephole, and froze.

Yibo seemed to sense his sudden mood, came over and looked at the peephole to see who it is that made him shocked.

_It's their parents._

They looked at each other. 

There's no denying what kind of activities they've been doing just now, judging by the debauched look on Xiao Zhan's face and the marks peppering his body. 

Yibo fared no better. 

His face flushed, his cock's still half hard and dripping with lube and cum, and his body bore the same marks as the other. But he just shrugged and pulled on his pants, before reaching for the door.

"Yibo! Are you nuts?" He hissed, hands on the other's. "What if they found out?" 

Yibo looked at him thoroughly, and chuckled.

"Really, Zhan-Ge? Then what you proposed we should do? Leave them out there until… oh I don't know, tomorrow? The day after? Or maybe until you're _ready to admit that we've fucked_ all these times?"

_Ooh that stings._

But before he could retort, Yibo had already opened the door, topless and displaying all the glory.

"Hey, dad, mom, what a surprise!" He moved aside to let them in. _What a surprise indeed._ "What brings you here in Korea after two years?" Yibo was still being his lowkey snarky-bitch self as usual. He didn't give hugs but kissed his mother's cheek lightly.

Xiao Zhan finally composed himself, forced out a smile and hugged his mom, and gave a firm handshake to his dad.

"Mom, dad."

"Zhanzhan." His dad looked at him, then to Yibo. "What are you guys doing this time of the night all sweaty and smelly? And what's with those bruises?" He eyed them suspiciously. 

_Trust Yibo's father to get straight to the point. Just like his son._

"Ah, we just finished gym, dad, you know, keeping fit and all…" Xiao Zhan finally could muster some coherent reason out of his freshly fucked brain. He earned a chuckle from Yibo. 

_It's as if he laughed at his chickening out… again._

The tension was palpable in their apartment, until their mother broke it by talking to them. 

"Yibo, Zhanzhan, we'll be staying here for the night. Your father has a sudden meeting in Korea and we could not get a hotel in time. We'll be back to China tomorrow night."

Yibo was the first one to move. 

"You can stay in my room, I'll pack my things to Zhan-Ge's room." He walked back to his unoccupied room, to mess with something to show that it was at least being inhabited at some point, not just for storing his clothes and stuff.

"Zhanzhan." His father gave him that _look._ "I think it's time for us to talk."

  
  
  
  
  


They spent the night snuggling in silence, with Xiao Zhan thinking hard of what his dad had said. It weighed heavily on his mind, and it made his body tense until Yibo asked him what's wrong.

"Nothing."

"Nothing? Your body is wound like a tightly coiled spring. Did dad say something to you?"

"It's nothing, Yibo. Go to sleep, you have class tomorrow."

Yibo looked at him, but he didn't push.

_This can wait._

  
  
  
  
  
  


Morning came and they woke up to the sound of knockings on their door. 

Xiao Zhan was up in seconds, put naked Yibo under the blanket, and opened the door to find his mom.

"Mom… ? What is it? Where's dad?"

His mom was looking visibly upset. Her luggage behind her.

"Zhanzhan, I… your father had to leave this morning, and he told me to leave too… he said that you both were… living in sin. Is that true Zhanzhan?" She looked like she almost cried.

Xiao Zhan sighed. "Mom." He hugged her. "I love him." 

He felt his mother tensed for a few seconds, then hugged him back. 

"Oh, Zhanzhan, darling, I know… I know you have loved each other since you were kids. I know that's why you left. I know Zhanzhan…" she cried softly while hugging him tight. 

"But… how, mom? I've never shown any of my feelings…" his voice faltered.

"Zhanzhan…" his mother touched his now full-of-tears face. "A mother always knew." She kissed his forehead. "Take care of him, Zhanzhan, I will always love you." She looked behind him. "And you too, Yibo." 

Xiao Zhan looked behind him to see Yibo standing behind him, wearing only his boxer with a look of defiance in his eyes. It softened a little when his mother hugged him. 

"I love you, Yibo, I always took you as my own son. Please take care of each other from now on." She kissed his cheek and then left.

Yibo turned back to Xiao Zhan.

"Now tell me what father said to you last night."

  
  
  
  
  


"Basically, he _knew_ about us, and he came to check last night." Xiao Zhan sat on the chair, drinking tepid tea. "He told me that he will cut us from everything, unless we stop seeing each other. And before you say anything, he told me that he _will_ know."

Yibo scoffed.

"Now you're being generous, Zhan-Ge. I know that's not what he said _exactly._ So spill." 

"Yibo." Xiao Zhan held his hands. "You tell me that I'm a coward not to admit my feelings to you. So, I need you to hear this. I will fight for us. You don't have to think about anything, just finish your school, and I will think of everything else. Understood?" He squeezed his hand tight. "I love you. And we're going to make this work."

  
  
  
  
  


They had to move out from their cozy 2 bedrooms apartment to a studio apartment near their school. It's cramped, but neither of them mind, because they're still together. Xiao Zhan would cook simply and they would go to their part time work after school.

  
  


Yibo felt something was off six month later.

He saw Xiao Zhan was getting thinner, and there's a grey pallor in his skin. He tried to coax the older to tell him what's wrong, but he just shrugged.

"School. Work. Tired."

Yibo looked at him intensely. 

He knew that the last year of master of arts would be very demanding, with all the assignments and the exhibitions, not to mention their part time odd jobs. His own mechanical engineering subject was also very demanding, but he got by, with his love for motorcycles and all.

He knew they hadn't made love for at least a month now, but that's how life was. He did not complain, because finally he could live with his Zhan-ge. For that, he would do anything. He would _sacrifice_ anything.

  
  
  
  


He knew he had to do something. Judging by the way that the older was getting tired all the time, something must be wrong. 

One day he followed him, out of curiosity.

He didn't go to school as he said he was, but instead going to work at the cafe, then after his shift was over, he walked for a bit to a bakery, then walked in… to change his clothes to a baker's white. There he worked until night, then walked again, until Yibo caught up with him.

He didn't say anything, just gave him the spare helmet. Xiao Zhan looked at him, but didn't say anything, just accepted the helmet and jumped behind his back.

"Hold on tight."

They drove through the night, and reached their apartment after a short ride.

They walked inside, hand in hand, in silence.

"Let me draw you a bath. You must be tired." 

Yibo walked to their small bathroom, but Xiao Zhan's hand caught him.

"No need, Yibo, I just need to rest for a bit." He smiled weakly. "Thanks for the thought though. I love you, baobei." He kissed Yibo's knuckles tenderly.

That night, they made love. 

They moved in slow rhythm, not in a hurry at all. Just savoring the moment, enjoying each other's comfort, before facing another day.

  
  
  
  
  
  


"Baobei, I'm off. Do you have school today?" Xiao Zhan asked him. None of them mentioned what happened last night, and no one offered any explanation.

"Mm, this afternoon. What time will you be back?"

"Probably not too late." He kissed Yibo's mouth tenderly. "I love you." _More than you'll ever know._

"I love you too, Ge." _More than you'll ever know._

They echoed each other's sentiments inside their mind, willing to do anything for their loved one.

As soon as the door closed, Yibo moved from his chair, and waited for another minute until he was sure Xiao Zhan was not coming back, then he started to rummage through every table, every drawer, everywhere, until he found what he's looking for. Under the deepest part of their linen drawer, at the back.

He pulled out everything from out there, and the direness of their situation dawned on him.

_Bills. Bills. Bills. Electricity. Rent. Credit cards._

Everything was written under a large red mark with the writing of 'Final Notice' on them.

Then he found something out.

A letter.

_From the university._

_Xiao Zhan cashed out his last year of tuition, since he would not be attending anymore._

And it was dated six month ago, right after their father gave him the ultimatum.

Yibo felt like the world crashed down on him.

_Was this the consequences of their love?_

  
  
  
  
  
  


He knew he had to do something.

So he did what he did best. Racing.

_But first thing first._

He went to the administration office at his school, and arranged for everything. Then he left to prepare for his race tonight.

 _He won_.

He always won.

He didn't tell his lover about his decision. He just didn't want to worry him. After all, this was _his_ decision.

But one day, 6 months later, when the police raid came and arrested everyone, he didn't have a choice but to call him. He didn't want to make him worry more than he should.

  
  
  
  
  
  


Xiao Zhan thought he heard wrong. 

He thought that everything was fine, that Yibo got this one-in-a-lifetime employment in a race track, the time was convenient, and the pay was good. So good that he didn't need to work 3 jobs again.

_Oh, how wrong he was._

_He should've known better._

That night, he didn't go to prison to bail his soulmate out. Instead, he made a long overdue long-distance call to China, to put everything right back on its track once again.

  
  
  
  
  


Yibo waited for his boyfriend to bail him out.

_He didn't come._

Instead, there was a surprise visitor in the morning, the one that gave him chills all over.

_What have you done, Zhan-Ge?_

  
  
  
  
  


He ran back to their modest apartment, to see that it's devoid of the other's possessions. He fell down on the floor, his knees weak, and he closed his eyes.

_This was a nightmare, he should wake up soon, and find his lover snuggling close beside him, like it should be._

"You do know that this is what's best for you both, right?" His father, his _biological_ father, stood beside him, offering his hand. "I told him that you will drag him down from being the man he was supposed to be. I told him to let you go to pursue his dreams. And what did he do? He played house with you for a year." He scoffed. "I guess a year is his limit, huh, when he finally surrendered and gave you back to pursue his dreams."

"What do you mean by that?"

"Didn't he tell you? He went to Europe. His flight departed this morning."

  
  
  
  


\-----

  
  
  
  


"I did it for you."

"I didn't ask you to."

"I know you didn't, and you would do everything in your power to be with me. Even if you had to sacrifice your own future." Xiao Zhan sighed heavily, and put his head into Yibo's shoulder, a gesture so familiar it hurt him. And took them back to those nights they spent together, after making love, under the stars.

"You know I would." He pulled him closer, just to smell the familiar scent of sweat and jasmine, and _him._

"But I couldn't let you do that." He circled his arms around Yibo's waist. "And look where it takes you, a world famous racer. A billionaire playboy." 

Yibo scoffed.

"People tend to exaggerate things. How could I be a playboy when all I ever want is you?"

"Smartass." He punched Yibo's arm lightly.

"What about you? I read somewhere that you have a secret lover because you won't even date…" Yibo kissed him softly. 

"Do you really need to ask?" He moaned when the younger moved his mouth downward to his collarbone, nipping it lightly in such a familiar way.

"I want to ask you so many things, Ge." His hands were back, cupping the luscious bottom, and dragged the pants off. "But first thing first." He pushed one of his fingers inside Xiao Zhan's rim, uncoated. 

_It hurt._

_But in a delicious, familiar way._

"You're so tight Ge, back like when I first breached you. Do you remember that night?" He pulled his finger out and coated it with the lube he took from his pant's pocket.

"I do, yes, I remember everything. And I never want to forget. The good, the bad, everything… ahh..." he moaned when he felt two fingers breached him. "You're all I can think of, all these years, Yibo… " he moved his body up and down, getting off on the frictions those fingers made inside his wall. "I touched myself, thinking about you. I went to all your races. I desperately want to talk to you, to _kiss_ you…"

Yibo put another finger inside, curved it so it grazed his prostate, making Xiao Zhan mewling and panting.

"I tried so long to find you. And when I did, I couldn't bring myself to talk to you." 

"Ahh.. why? Why Yibo? How long ago did you find me?" He tried to be conscious and alert to have a decent conversation, but he couldn't remember his name when those fingers pulled in and out of his hole in a familiar way, making him go crazy with needs.

"Just when you had your first debut." Yibo licked his nipples. "When I was racing professionally for the first time." He bit that nipples until Xiao Zhan's inside constricted.

"I saw you… ngghhah… at your first race… you were so wonderful… hahh… so beautiful… so… shiny… I'm so proud of you, baobei…" he moves his hips in a small circle, and Yibo drowned in the familiarity.

"I want to make you proud of me, Ge. I don't want to waste your sacrifice. And I knew that the only way we could be together again is when we're on top of the world, where no one dared to separate us...again" He replaced his fingers with his cock, lathered it with lube, and pushed it in one go.

"Ahhh, Jesus, Yibo… I haven't had sex ever since I left you… could you be kinder please…?" He took a deep breath to mold his inside around the familiar girth. It's been so long, but his body always remembered him.

"I love you, Ge. It's only been you." 

Yibo pushed his cock balls deep, and started to move, slowly at first, then faster, and faster, until they're both screaming in pleasure and Xiao Zhan shot the ribbons of white across their joined bodies. The clench made Yibo shoot his load inside of the only man he ever loved, filling him with his hot seed.

"I love you too, baobei, but this is a disaster, and my manager will kill me for this." He pointed at their crumpled and stained clothes, laughing freely for the first time after they've been separated by circumstance. But now, fate had brought them back together again, as it should be.

"I'll just give her my personal merchandise, since she seemed to love me so much."

"You're such a gremlin." 

"Yours, Ge."

"Mine."

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> Add me on twitter & instagram @chiaroscuro555


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